Moments for You

• Jump to Ordering Options
• Content Warning
• Listen to an Audio Excerpt

As a man who’s seen things, has lived through the worst and suffered through the rest, I couldn’t believe I worked at a place that hosted weddings for a living. Actual weddings, with tulle and lace and cake. The amount of work that went into weddings seemed to grow with each passing day and while I was glad I wasn’t in charge of it, I was confused how it all worked and why I was on the periphery of it.

It’d been two years since I moved to the outskirts of San Antonio, Texas, and I still woke up every morning wondering how the hell this was my job. Because it didn’t really feel like my job. People got married, looked happy, and went off to spend the rest of their lives doing God knows what as a married couple.

And somehow my growly ass was part of it.

Still not quite sure where I fit in.

“Why are you growling?”

I looked over at my boss, Trace, and shook my head. I was damn lucky that Trace had been looking for someone to help him with the security side of the Wilder Retreat. I’d had my own job a few hours away and thought I knew what the fuck I was doing.

Then fate had decided that no, that was not the case. No, my life turned on its axis, and there was no coming back from that.

When me and my brothers came here for a family reunion, I had offered myself up as tribute. I needed a job, a change. A place to run away, and I hadn’t wanted to ask my cousins, the ever popular and successful Wilder brothers, for help.

They owned this retreat. They, along with their spouses, had taken an old inn and winery that had slowly been going downhill and created something that was quite stunning.

Even when the storm knocked out some of the walls, had demolished a building or two, and carved through the land nearly two years ago, they rebuilt.

Because that’s what happened when the Wilders got in the way. We looked at the destruction, tried to fight back, and then we rebuilt.

And somehow I joined the fray, dragging along my three brothers.

Although Gabriel didn’t stay here, as he was usually out on tour being a rockstar, he was still here as much as he could be.

Brooks had decided to come and help rebuild because that’s what his job was, and he decided to stay. Same with Wyatt. Although Wyatt had decided to go crazy and built a bar and distillery on the property even though there was already a damn winery. Apparently the Wilder brothers and cousins were becoming a conglomerate, and I was the security specialist.

Because of course that made sense.

“Ridge? What’s up with you?”

I shook my head, pulling myself out of my own thoughts. The anniversary of my coming here was quickly approaching, and that meant in six months I’d reach the anniversary of something I didn’t want to think about. So I wouldn’t.

“What? I’m fine.”

“Sure, you are. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I blame you marrying Elliot and Sidney for you thinking I actually want to talk about my feelings. Elliot is the cousin who always likes to do that.”

Trace shook his head, a small smile playing on his face. He’d shaved his beard off a few months ago, and I knew my cousin had mourned that the big bushy thing was gone. But Trace liked a clean face, and it still surprised me to see that strong jawline instead of the beard.

I loved that my boss and cousin had not only gotten married, but they also married someone they had met on the property, a woman left at the altar. Well, she sure knew how to show the world that she could stand on her own two feet. Because she married not one man, but two, right on this property nearly a year and a half ago.

In fact, all of my cousins were married. The only female Wilder of our generation was married with two kids up in Colorado but visited often. Eliza was brilliant, and one of my favorite people in the world. I was also glad she didn’t live here so she couldn’t ask me any questions. She’d be able to see right through my snark and growls. And while I knew my cousins and brothers all wanted to know why I had decided to move here seemingly out of the blue, I knew Eliza would be the only person I would break for.

Eli was the eldest of us all. The fact that he was in charge of this whole place and seemed to have a vision for the Wilder Retreat and Winery to grow into something huge, honestly didn’t shock me. It should have, but it hadn’t. All six of my male cousins had gone into the military, kicked ass, and when things had broken down, or they were forced out, they came together because they needed each other. Now they all seemed healthy, happy, married.

Eli and his wife Alexis had a daughter named Kylie; and Evan and Kendall, who had been married twice, had twins, Reese and Cassie.

The rest of my cousins were probably going to follow the others when it came to babies, but for now they were taking time to enjoy being married.

I was kind of grateful for that—not that I wanted to think about it, because that would just etch those thoughts on my face, and then people would have questions.

And I hated questions.

“Come on, let’s go do the perimeter. We have the team on, but thankfully we don’t have a wedding today.”

I rolled my shoulders back, glad Trace changed the subject. No one needed to know why I started working here, why I needed to be near family.

Nobody.

“I thought we had that retirement ceremony?” I asked, looking over my tablet.

Trace nodded as we headed out of his office, in the main building of the inn, situated in the center of the Wilder property, and down the stairs.

It was part of the original structure, though some of it had been damaged in the tornado. They had rebuilt, thanks to my brother Wyatt, and everything was starting to look up again. Since my cousins bought the place, they had revamped many of the cabins on the property and added a few more in the distance that were eco-friendly. I was grateful for that, considering I lived in one. They also added a spa, which made me snort and roll my eyes, but people liked it, and the infinity pools were nice to swim in when no one was around. I didn’t want to deal with people.

That’s why I loved my job. I protected people, but I didn’t have to talk to them to do it.

They’d also added a high-end restaurant down the hill near the entrance of the property. My cousin-in-law Kendall ran it, as well as the catering and restaurant on the property itself, and I wasn’t quite sure how she was doing it all. Her longtime sous chef had moved away over a year ago because Sandy’s partner had gotten a dream job in Paris.

I didn’t quite understand how my cousin-in-law did it all, but she did kick ass. And the restaurant served some of the best food I’d ever had in my life. A little high-end for me, considering I wasn’t used to having at least three forks and two knives at a place setting, or having someone clean up the crumbs between each serving. Made me feel like I had too many thumbs.

Kendall was on her third round of sous chefs because people couldn’t keep up with her. And I didn’t say that lightly. Kendall could kick ass and expected the best out of people. And the people she kept hiring looked on paper as if they knew what they were doing, and passed all the security checks, but they sucked.

One had only wanted to be near another cousin-in-law of mine, an Academy Award-winning actress, and our other cousin-in-law, who happened to be the most famous pop star in the world. Oh, they had gone to culinary school, and were amazing at cooking and creating pastries for events and the restaurant, but they had spent most of their time trying to stalk both Lark and Bethany.

Kicking them out had been fun.

At least it gave me a little thrill.

The second person couldn’t keep up with the demand of a wedding business, catering business, and a high-end restaurant.

It was a lot, but Kendall had it down to a science, and she just needed someone to step in who could not only follow rules but have some vision when it came to baking.

Of course, it didn’t always work out that way.

She was on the third one now, and I thought they were doing pretty good, considering some of the desserts I’d tried, but knowing our luck, I wasn’t sure how long they would last.

“Are we heading out to the winery today?” I asked, following Trace.

The property itself had come with the vines and the winery. Many of the staff working on that had actually come with the original place too. They were okay with the change to Wilder Wines and were damn good at creating new blends.

Two of my cousins were handling that section, which was good because I wasn’t a wine guy, though they made things taste pretty decent.

“On our end, we have two tours going on today, bigger ones with the wine clubs, but the team has it. You and I are going to go head over to the west side and check on the bar and distillery.” Trace rolled his eyes. “I still cannot believe that Wyatt somehow convinced the others to add that on.”

I laughed; I couldn’t help it.

“Well, we Wilder cousins couldn’t just stand back and let the six of them take over the world.”

“Much to Elliot’s consternation,” Trace added. “However, you guys buying the acreage next door and buying in to the business so you’re all partners? Damn good decision. Although I still don’t know why you call me boss when you’re part owner.”

I shook my head, that odd uncomfortable feeling coming again. This place had become far more permanent than I planned, but I couldn’t help it. My brothers were here. My family was here.

And I didn’t have anywhere else to go.

“You own it, too, just like Elliot does. Apparently it’s an all-in-the-family situation. And you were here first for security.”

“Good job I’ve done.” He rolled his eyes. “I swear, people are getting more brazen.”

“But you’re keeping them out. Keeping people safe. I know it’s not easy when this place has become a hotspot for celebrities to get married and have events. Although why they would want to come to San Antonio, Texas, I don’t know.”

Trace snorted and looked over his shoulder, as if afraid someone would pop out of the bushes and kick me in the shins for saying that. “You do realize that we live here now. We should probably not shit on the city we live in.”

“True. And we are in hill country. It’s beautiful. But, I don’t know, I thought most people would want a destination wedding on a beach or something.”

“But then sand gets in places.” Trace shuddered, and I threw my head back and laughed, truly meaning it.

I liked Trace. I liked it here.

We had over a hundred acres with a winery, a distillery, a spa, forested trails, and cabins. We had a tasting room, barrel rooms, and huge buildings for all the equipment for the winery. Let alone the vines.

We had a farmhouse, chicken coops, and even another annex with all the farm equipment. We had an outside dance hall, an indoor one, and a huge fountain area for parties and weddings.

I literally couldn’t believe this was where I lived, and this was what we did for a living. I watched people make promises to each other and wondered what would have happened if I’d been able to keep mine.

“I don’t know what we’re going to do,” Alexis snapped as she paced down the path, Eli on her heels.

“Babe. Let’s go inside and talk about it. We’ll figure it out.”

She whirled on him, though I saw panic in her eyes, not anger. “Figure it out? How the hell are we supposed to figure it out when I’m the one freaking out? I never freak out. I’m the wedding planner for this entire business. I can handle this. I’ve handled everything. But I don’t know if I can do this, Eli.”

She pulled her long dark hair away from her face, putting it in a messy bun, which I’d rarely seen from her. She was the epitome of being put together. I had seen brides break down, mothers-in-law fighting over their precious children, and even people coming to blows, and Alexis had always been steadfast.

She could handle anything, and yet for some reason, something seemed to have broken her.

“Babe. We can figure this out.” Eli cupped his wife’s face. People were milling about, guests who were here just for a vacation rather than a wedding, but nobody was paying attention. They all had things on their minds, nothing to do with the tableau in front of them.

Trace and I went to them, knowing that this might be private, but if she was freaking out, we had to find out if it was for security reasons.

“I don’t know why I’m acting like this,” Alexis whispered.

“We both know why you’re acting like this.”

The two of them met each other’s gazes, and I knew.

I ignored the little clutch in my belly, the memories.

Because they didn’t matter. Why should they?

Enough time had passed.

It wasn’t as if anything had really been real, right? I stood on that precipice before, watched the unending worry and hope and promises cascade into my life.

But it wasn’t there anymore.

I worked in the business of protecting futures, so why should I live in the past?

“Everything okay over here?” I asked, my voice low. I needed to get out of my head, needed to forget. But when the two of them looked at me, their eyes wide, it was a kick in the gut.

“Sorry. Just overreacting.” Alexis wiped away her tears. I hated seeing them because Alexis didn’t cry. Not when it came to work. She kicked ass.

“What’s wrong? Do you need to sit down?” Trace asked.

Both Eli and Alexis looked at each other before they smiled a secret smile, and I ignored the pain in my stomach and the way my palms went damp.

I ignored it all.

“There’s a bride issue, and I’m overreacting, you know, because hormones.” She grinned as she said it, her eyes brightening. Eli’s chest puffed out. I nearly rolled my eyes at the sight, until I remembered.

I remembered doing the exact same fucking thing.

“Well damn,” Trace said before he reached out and plucked Alexis off her feet. He whirled her about as she laughed and Eli scowled. “Hands off my wife. You already have two spouses of your own. Don’t hurt her.”

“As if I could hurt her. Look at you, congratulations to you both.” Trace smacked a hard kiss on her lips, and Eli continued to scowl, though I saw the pride and happiness in his gaze.

“We were waiting until we got out of the first trimester. But yes, there’s going to be a new Wilder.”

“Shudder the thought,” I said with a laugh. “But you know the world needs more Wilders.”

Did my voice sound as if I was happy? Could they hear the hollowness? The rasp?

I didn’t think so, not with the absolute glee on their faces, so I just ignored the feeling in my stomach. Ignored the idea that I wanted to jump from the nearest hill and see what could happen to a body once bones broke and the world ended.

But I wasn’t that man. I couldn’t be. I had to be here.

Even though I wanted to be anywhere else.

“Seriously though, congratulations,” I added after clearing my throat. “But what else is wrong? Something with a wedding?”

Alexis nearly teared up again, and I cursed myself.

Then she did the most amazing thing and rolled her shoulders back and pulled out her phone. “We lost a dress.”

Trace whistled through his teeth as Eli winced and I just looked confused.

“As in you misplaced it? Want me to ask the guys to look for it? I’m sure we can find it. Or do you think it was stolen? Hell, please don’t tell me it was stolen right under our noses?”

I didn’t even want to think about the paperwork and publicity with that shit.

Alexis immediately shook her head, but the relief was only short-lived. “The bride was wearing a family heirloom, her great-grandmother’s dress. Her grandmother and her mother had each worn it, and they each did small alterations just for the fit. They went to a reputable seamstress, though not one on our list of vendors. They went to the same place they had always used. Or so they thought.” Alexis scowled, and I winced. I would not want to be on the receiving end of that look. “It seems that it’s the same building, the same name, but not run by the same person. That person closed down shop and took everything. No notes, no calls, and are completely unreachable. They took all of the dresses, and I can’t find them. And I can usually find anyone.”

“Are you kidding me?” I asked, shaking my head. “Did they call the cops?”

Alexis nodded. “Over twenty dresses are gone, probably more. Only one from here, but there are countless brides out there who are in pain because they lost their dresses, and this one was an heirloom. I don’t know what the ever loving hell we’re going to do. The wedding is in three days, and we don’t have a backup dress.” She put her hand on her stomach before going slightly green and twisting towards the bushes.

Eli was immediately at her side, holding her hair back as I jogged over to the side building and plucked out a bottle of water that we had in one of the fridges for all of the staff and guests.

I came back and unscrewed the top, handing it over.

She nodded her thanks.

“Oh good, why do I always get second-trimester nausea?” she asked before she gulped half the bottle of water down.

I remembered another person who had that same thing, though I wouldn’t think about it. Or I kept lying to myself that I wouldn’t.

“What are you going to do?” I asked, oddly curious. Because Alexis was a problem solver, but I didn’t know how they were going to solve this.

“I can’t bring back the memories, I can’t fix what was lost, but maybe I can do something else. I just hope asking for help works.”

She nodded and headed back to her office, looking for all the world like the empress on a war mission. Eli nodded at us and followed her. Trace pulled out his phone, and I wondered if he was calling his contacts to see if there was something he could do.

I wasn’t sure what I could do to help, since this was completely out of my comfort zone. But she was right, we couldn’t fix the past. We could only look to the future.

And I wasn’t good at that. Never had been.

That’s why I lived here. Away from things that reminded me of my past.

But I guess that wasn’t quite the case.

Because when you watch the woman you love die, feel her last heartbeat under your hands, you know that there’s no hope for a future. Especially when she was carrying your child.

You don’t get second chances. You don’t get happy ever afters. I could watch others do so around me, but it wasn’t for me.

I had that. And I lost it.

I lost everything.

I never wanted a second chance.

At least not unless I could turn back time.